Friday, April 9, 2010
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Published!!!
So, it finally happened. I've become successful beyond my imagination. Okay, that's a complete lie, but I have had a bit of good news: I had an article published in Pirates Magazine, Issue 10. It's a nice little article, and it comes with great pictures of our wedding.
The good news is that it may serve as yet another example that couples can search their own imaginations to come up with a wedding that THEY really want. And...it can have meaning, and fun, and romance.
Pirates Magazine can be found at Borders and Barnes and Noble Bookstores. Check it out!
Saturday, June 27, 2009
The Spirit of a Pirate
I just finished reading the Vanity Fair article on Johnny Depp. It talked about a trip he took with a journalist friend and a few others to spend some time both aboard his boat, the Vajoliroja and on his 45 acre private Bahamian island. They spent days of reading, listening to good music, and eating great food. This is where Depp decompresses between acting and publicity gigs. Money to purchase both came mostly from his stint as Captain Jack. He wears a near identical tattoo on one of his arms as his alter ego wore, a sparrow flying over waves. Above his boat flies a jolly roger. Both serve as reminders of a spirit that he embraces. The spirit of the pirate isn't to be found on board his boat, nor is it to be found lounging on the sands of his island. The spirit of the pirate that Depp seems to embrace is found in the nature of his work and the way he has decided to NOT embrace most of the day to day business that surrounds it. He informs the parts he plays both with research, but also with his own Bohemian spirit.
When I finish this particular blog posting, I will, as usual, post a link on Twitter. Twitter seems to be something of a double edged sword when it comes to embracing the pirate spirit. Everyday I get a note saying someone has signed on to follow me on Twitter. Most of these requests come from individuals and companies that did a search under the word "wedding" and then requested to follow every person that came up. When a person of a piratical sort requests to follow me, I am thrilled, because I feel that maybe the actually looked at the content I'm posting and found something interesting. But I also say yes to many of the "wedding" searchers as well. My hope, is that maybe one or two of them will be moved to attempt to become more inclusive. I hope they can not only seek to provide goods for the women that desire "her day" as a princess, but also that they will seek to provide goods and services to those that seek a more alternative wedding.
What then is the Spirit of the Pirate about which I am speaking? It's the spirit that encourages people to make their own way. Seek the inner spirit that is uniquely them, and bring it out in all they do, including how they get married. It's not about finding the most expensive designer dress, or making sure your cake is the tallest. There will ALWAYS be a fancier dress, a larger cake. It's not about living a life that others will look at and approve or not, it's about finding our own compass and sailing a course set by our inner life, using our heart as our rudder. Johnny Depp seems to be doing this, and oddly, his most commercial success, Pirates of the Caribbean, was about a pirate making his own way.
When I finish this particular blog posting, I will, as usual, post a link on Twitter. Twitter seems to be something of a double edged sword when it comes to embracing the pirate spirit. Everyday I get a note saying someone has signed on to follow me on Twitter. Most of these requests come from individuals and companies that did a search under the word "wedding" and then requested to follow every person that came up. When a person of a piratical sort requests to follow me, I am thrilled, because I feel that maybe the actually looked at the content I'm posting and found something interesting. But I also say yes to many of the "wedding" searchers as well. My hope, is that maybe one or two of them will be moved to attempt to become more inclusive. I hope they can not only seek to provide goods for the women that desire "her day" as a princess, but also that they will seek to provide goods and services to those that seek a more alternative wedding.
What then is the Spirit of the Pirate about which I am speaking? It's the spirit that encourages people to make their own way. Seek the inner spirit that is uniquely them, and bring it out in all they do, including how they get married. It's not about finding the most expensive designer dress, or making sure your cake is the tallest. There will ALWAYS be a fancier dress, a larger cake. It's not about living a life that others will look at and approve or not, it's about finding our own compass and sailing a course set by our inner life, using our heart as our rudder. Johnny Depp seems to be doing this, and oddly, his most commercial success, Pirates of the Caribbean, was about a pirate making his own way.
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
What Are You Going To Choose For Your Last Meal?
Creepy question, I know. But think about it, if you knew your next meal was going to be your last meal, what would you want? Most likely, it wouldn't just be something off the menu. I mean, if you could have ANYTHING for that last meal, you're certainly not going to just say, "Bring me your most popular dinner." Right? You would consider carefully what you wanted.
I bring this up because deciding what you want for your wedding should require the same kind of thinking. Why choose the same wedding that EVERYONE else has? I mean, don't just change up the color of the bride's maid's dresses, really think about all of it's parts. Your wedding, and I hope this is reaching brides and grooms, should be YOURS. Now that isn't to say that you are going to run out and have a pirate wedding, but think of the pirate wedding as a symbol.
Many pirates started out as privateers in service to their country. They were a tool in a struggle for control of territory and profits. Eventually, many of those privateers ended up on the outside of the protection of the government that recruited them. Having learned to make a life on the sea as pirates in service to their country, they then became pirates in service to their own survival. Outlaws. They made their own rules and became masters of their own destinies.
Many people end up having a wedding that looks nothing like what they had originally envisioned, but surprisingly similar to every other wedding they see in a magazine. They end up serving the industry, and not their own desires. I say, your wedding is far too important to let this happen. It's fun to pick and choose ideas from the bridal magazines, but it's even more fun and meaningful to come up with ideas of your own creation. You are heading into the wedding firmly believing this to be the one time you are going to get married. So while it's not exactly your last meal, it IS supposed to be in theory, your last weddding. Choose wisely. Embrace your inner pirate!
I bring this up because deciding what you want for your wedding should require the same kind of thinking. Why choose the same wedding that EVERYONE else has? I mean, don't just change up the color of the bride's maid's dresses, really think about all of it's parts. Your wedding, and I hope this is reaching brides and grooms, should be YOURS. Now that isn't to say that you are going to run out and have a pirate wedding, but think of the pirate wedding as a symbol.
Many pirates started out as privateers in service to their country. They were a tool in a struggle for control of territory and profits. Eventually, many of those privateers ended up on the outside of the protection of the government that recruited them. Having learned to make a life on the sea as pirates in service to their country, they then became pirates in service to their own survival. Outlaws. They made their own rules and became masters of their own destinies.
Many people end up having a wedding that looks nothing like what they had originally envisioned, but surprisingly similar to every other wedding they see in a magazine. They end up serving the industry, and not their own desires. I say, your wedding is far too important to let this happen. It's fun to pick and choose ideas from the bridal magazines, but it's even more fun and meaningful to come up with ideas of your own creation. You are heading into the wedding firmly believing this to be the one time you are going to get married. So while it's not exactly your last meal, it IS supposed to be in theory, your last weddding. Choose wisely. Embrace your inner pirate!
Monday, April 20, 2009
What's The Meaning Of All This????
"Now and then we had a hope that if we lived and were good, God would permit us to be pirates."
Mark Twain - Life on the Mississippi
When Mark Twain wrote these words, he was talking about the whimsical desires of youth. They come and go, we reassess and move on. Thanks to the "Pirates of the Caribbean" franchise, the world of pirates became popular again in the culture. And then, as if with the tides, it's popularity subsided. If you said the word "pirate" several years ago, Johnny Depp came to mind. Today, as I write this, the word will evoke thoughts of recent news items surrounding Somali Pirates and the daring rescue of Captain Richard Phillips. While these real life crimes on the sea are important, I hope they don't take away any affection for the romantic notion of pirates to which Mark Twain was alluding.
When we chose to have a pirate wedding, our thoughts were focused on the mythic and romantic notion of pirates from movies of the past and from literature. We did a fair amount of research into the real pirates of history, and understood the complicated nature of the theme we had chosen. But we made great efforts to remind people that while historical pirates indeed have a dark shadow, we were more interested in the romantic and whimsical ideas that surround them. The historical origins of traditions found in "traditional" wedding ceremonies have equally complicated backgrounds. If you do a little digging, you find references to warring families, evil spirits, or armed kidnappings of brides. Usually people planning weddings don't think much about the traditions they are including in their ceremonies, nor do the guests, they just include them because "that's how weddings are done." Since we were attempting to create a ceremony from the ground up surrounding a complicated theme, we wanted to consider all the parts and their meanings. We felt that for us, this was the only way we could really imbue the ceremony with both fun AND heartfelt meaning.
As you are planning your wedding, I encourage you to really look at its parts. You don't have to re-invent the wheel, but by planning your wedding in a way that embraces all the meanings that surround it, you create a deeper experience for yourself and your guests.
Mark Twain - Life on the Mississippi
When Mark Twain wrote these words, he was talking about the whimsical desires of youth. They come and go, we reassess and move on. Thanks to the "Pirates of the Caribbean" franchise, the world of pirates became popular again in the culture. And then, as if with the tides, it's popularity subsided. If you said the word "pirate" several years ago, Johnny Depp came to mind. Today, as I write this, the word will evoke thoughts of recent news items surrounding Somali Pirates and the daring rescue of Captain Richard Phillips. While these real life crimes on the sea are important, I hope they don't take away any affection for the romantic notion of pirates to which Mark Twain was alluding.
When we chose to have a pirate wedding, our thoughts were focused on the mythic and romantic notion of pirates from movies of the past and from literature. We did a fair amount of research into the real pirates of history, and understood the complicated nature of the theme we had chosen. But we made great efforts to remind people that while historical pirates indeed have a dark shadow, we were more interested in the romantic and whimsical ideas that surround them. The historical origins of traditions found in "traditional" wedding ceremonies have equally complicated backgrounds. If you do a little digging, you find references to warring families, evil spirits, or armed kidnappings of brides. Usually people planning weddings don't think much about the traditions they are including in their ceremonies, nor do the guests, they just include them because "that's how weddings are done." Since we were attempting to create a ceremony from the ground up surrounding a complicated theme, we wanted to consider all the parts and their meanings. We felt that for us, this was the only way we could really imbue the ceremony with both fun AND heartfelt meaning.
As you are planning your wedding, I encourage you to really look at its parts. You don't have to re-invent the wheel, but by planning your wedding in a way that embraces all the meanings that surround it, you create a deeper experience for yourself and your guests.
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Why Pirate Weddings?
When my wife and I were planning our wedding (the second for both of us), we knew we wanted something different. We still wanted a meaningful event, but we knew we didn't want the cookie cutter-white dress-black tuxedo wedding that seems to be the norm. We also wanted to make sure that I, the groom, was involved in the planning and I gotta tell you, if the question is which color teal do we make the napkins, it may not hold my attention.
I know some people think of the wedding as the bride's big day, but let's get real.: the day belongs to both of you! We wanted the ocean. We wanted an event that everyone would remember, and if I have to be totally honest, I'm a sucker for a great theme. When we discussed our desires, I half-jokingly suggested a pirate wedding, and she said yes. We were off and running. Men with guns and swords, women in bodices, rum punch, ocean view, pewter tankards... it went on and on.
When we set off to plan the wedding, we found that the wedding industry on the whole wasn't that interested in creating alternative weddings, they want you to buy their stuff, so we really had to make it up as we went along. My desire for this blog site is to provide some information that might help, or offer myself as a guide if you prefer more customized help.
Check back for more notes from our adventure.
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